This was a thought that went through my mind all of the time. "What do they think of me? Will they like my choice? Are they judging me?" Anytime I thought about buying something, creating a goal, dreaming, or even how I parent my kids in public. I was constantly worried about what others were thinking about what I was doing. Have you noticed yourself doing this? It can be so sneaky and you may not even notice your thinking about it. The thought, "What will they think of me?", will hold you back from living the life that you truly want.
For years I made decisions based on what I thought everyone else wanted me to do. I recently shared this at an event and it was a huge growth point for me to even start to become more aware of how I have been playing certain roles in my life, because I thought that would make others happy. In the end, they didn't care either way, and I wasn't happy. As a child I desired to be "good" and not rock the boat. I was easy, didn't make trouble, got good grades, and excelled at everything I did. As a girlfriend and newly married young woman, I wanted to be the perfect wife for Ryan. It was very important to me that he was happy with me. That I was going a good job. Dinner was ready, the house was clean, etc. What's the craziest part, I was the one who put myself into this role! I put the pressure on myself to perform in this role. I wasn't even aware of it. What's dangerous about this is that when we are imitating or acting as something that's not our true self, we start to lose who we really are. I have been on a mission of becoming my authentic self again. I'm thankful I wan't too far away, but I am still working on becoming my truest and highest self everyday.
It's REALLY normal to care what people think of us. It's our conditioning to do as others tell us, and behave as they want us to, but what benefit does it give us? Here is the most important question... What do you think of you? If you met you, would you like you? That is what MATTERS! There will always people that disagree with you, that don't understand your choices, etc.
Who do you make choices for? Are you living your life the way you want... Think about it... Do you like...
-your marriage
-your job
-your car
-your house
-your health
-your financial situation
If the answer to any of this is no... who is responsible for changing it? Not the people who you are worried about and what they think. The answer is YOU! You are the only person that can shift your life. Where would be the first area you want to change? I want to encourage you to really look at the choices that you make and examine if they are for you, or for someone else.
I want to leave you with this story that I heard on a podcast with Ed Mylett & Rachel Hollis. Ed explained how that when he gets to heaven someday, he believes that we will meet the "me" that lived and reached their full potential and he hopes that it is like meeting his identical twin versus a complete stranger.
Quit living your life thee way that you think people want you to. Live the way YOU want. Live as the person that God created you to be. That is the best you.
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